As we enter July I am in awe of how this year has unfolded. At the start, I did not know the plans, did not anticipate some of the shifts, and could not see how questions were going to form into answers. And yet we have a new chapter underway, changes in approaches taking shape, and a whole lot of answers (and maybe a few new questions 🙂 ). Sometimes July can feel like it snuck up or a little hard – how are we half way to the new year? It can challenge you or sadden you or frustrate you…. but this year it is reminding me how much can change just so quickly.
In May we moved and in June we had to start learning how to live in new. Both had aspects that were easier than anticipated and also much harder. The beautiful gift has been that we are moving through the new season slowly. Richmond area is where Shannon, OIiver and I call home – but Shannon is still in her school from the last three years until August. Which means Oliver and I still come back to my parents house so I can work and he can relish a fenced yard. This has also helped us still plug in and enjoy the life we have built in Charlottesville area: doing things with my parents, enjoying our friends here, and soak up our familiar patterns admits change.
Over the spring and into the summer life has changed with work, how we interact with Danny and his world, and what I want for my spiritual and physical health. These things have prompted serious shifts in approach, lightening of mental load, and new challenge to how I live out my 2024 word: gentle. Now more than ever I am having to be gentle with myself, with Shannon and with those in our life as we all seek improvements, focus on what matters, all with the goal of cultivating peace. Each are of growth calls for these factors and all have delivered some incredible beauty, when I am not afraid to step into the change.
As I reflect on 2024 so far and attempt to describe what it has meant and could mean, there are two messages that have settled in my heart and one symbol that I am revisiting often.
Message 1:
- “God’s plans are not our own.” This truth has felt alive in my life for decades. Well for all of my life because it is a reality, but I have seen it in action in ways so surprising I continue to think that He won’t ever be able to truly shock me again, and yet here I am.
Message 2:
- “God can work all things for good.” As I start to experience answers to a few of the tough questions that have plagued my thoughts often for the past 4 years: “Will we eventually settle?” “What will it look like?” “Who will be part of it?” “What will it feel like?” “Where will we will live?” “What about Catholic School?” “How will Shannon fair?” “What will she understand?” – I see that every little detail God can use to move us towards the greatest desire of our hearts. You see I am someone who just feels that if things do not look, feel, and appear to resemble what my brain has defined as “good” – then its just wrong. Even though I have built a whole life on “making the best of it”, I still so greatly desire chasing the defined “good” with a very clearly laid out plan of life. And yet, God has shown me His ability to take even the severely broken journey and transform it to a beautiful path that leads to our greatest longings.
The Symbol:
- In our new church there is a statue of Mary. She is depicted to be “winnowing” – where she throws into the air the contents of her basket so the wind can blow away the parts that aren’t needed and the heavy kernels that are needed, remain. It is to remind us that we have to throw our life up to God and trust he will blow away the things that don’t matter and keep the the ones that do.
These three have played out in our world in numerous ways in 2024. One pretty good example is that living down in this part of Virginia is not something I expected or even felt like an exact match. Northern Virginia has always felt like home, thus that feeling made me believe that up there is where we would need to return. However what I am learning is that what truly makes up home is the ability to build family life, a church community and Catholic based education. Those are the things that my heart has truly desired and Richmond has provided opportunities for all of these seeds to be planted and if I give it a chance, grow.
These are my reflections from the start of 2024 to now and the lens for viewing the rest of 2024 to come. And if you find yourself in a season where you are hoping for change or new opportunities – big or small – you may be surprised what the rest of the year can hold and how God makes it happen.
Thank you so much for reading and make it a great day!
Jackie
Have A Little Faith in We 